March 12th, 2008


Got lunch?

Here's your entrepreneurial streak for the day. (I've been inspired by all these barters taking place!)

I cook and bake things. Good things. From scratch. I use whole wheat flour, sugar alternatives, fresh vegetables, a lot of organic ingredients - basically the pinnacle of uber-healthy, balanced meals, except that they have to taste good enough to entice me to make them, and feed my Burger King-loving boyfriend too. I've whipped up everything from banana oat peanut bread to steak fajitas to vegetable pizza to roulette-ingredient stir-fry (I think my only failure has been quinoa adzuki bean cranberry almond porridge. Don't try that.) My specialties are vegetarian fare - though I'm not one - and bread. Lots of bread.

My friends say, "You should open a restaurant!", and I got to thinking. I live downtown. I have a large bike basket. I can easily cook enough for 3 people, plus myself. I love it when people try my food. I often nag everyone to eat healthier. I need to get out more... plus get better about taking care of my blood sugar during the day. So here's the pitch.

Would anyone be interested in sort of a "lunchpool" a couple days a week? Maybe something like M-W-F or T-TH? I cycle by your place of business at lunchtime with a tupperware container of homemade, yummy surprise food, you give back the previous day's tupperware, along with $6 or so, and I go to the next drop. You don't have to stand in line somewhere for greasy food. You try new, zany and delicious things. And support the obvious contributing factors, plus your local geek. Yay!

Given, I'm not a restaurant - it's homemade and you have to trust that I won't give you salmonella. But I'm a damn fine cook and haven't poisoned myself to date. I've delivered spider plants to DamnPortlanders before, and I think this would be a hoot. Is anyone into this idea? Are there any variations or other opportunities I missed? Who wants to sign up? I'm due to bake a fresh batch of bread today...

thegirlnextdork at gmail!


I would like to start bicycling as a way to commute this spring. It will be to the Max, to work, and around PSU (totaling around 5ish miles a day).

I want to be sure I do this properly and safely.

I have a helmet, lights, and reflective doo dads. I am learning the signals. And I know to watch for cars/stay in my lane.

What other helpful tips do you have for me?
  • Current Mood
    curious curious
Conjure Oils


Hello everyone!

I was wondering if perhaps you could offer me some suggestions.

I own and operate a relatively new (I opened in July of '07) perfume oil business, Conjure Oils. It is an online business (for the most part) that sells hand blended perfume oils as well as ritual oils. I do sell locally in two locations: Mademoiselle Noelle's Fortune Teahouse (at NE 57th and Fremont) and Size Queen Clothing (on E Burnside next to Full Circle Temple).

Now here's my question: Can you think of any other shops that may be interested in carrying my oils? I think a lot of Portlanders would rather get their oils (magickal and otherwise) from a Portland based business if they had the choice.

What think ye, damn Portlanders?

Thanks in advance! :D
  • Current Mood
    curious curious
hot fuzz

ISO Lonely Places

My spouse and I are taking a week's vacation, and we're planning on spending it somewhere along the Oregon coast. Do you guys have any recommendations for places/towns to visit?

All suggestions are welcome, but we're weird people; ideally we'd like to find a place to stay in an empty and windblown small town, where it feels like we're at the end of the world.

We don't need warm water (haha), busy shopping areas, quaint gingerbread b&b's (ugh), or activities of any kind. All we want is the ocean, a grocery store, and maybe a rundown old restaurant or two. I don't know the coast at all, so I have no idea where I'd find a town like that, if one even exists.

Thanks in advance!


The time has come that I need to give away my three sweet kitties. I am recently divorced and moved into a small apartment where I can’t bring them with me. They have been staying at the house with my ex but he no longer wants to care for them. I really really don’t want to have to bring them to the humane society. I have had all three since they were very young. Please help me find good homes for them! I am heartbroken to give them up but I just can’t afford to live in a larger place where they would be comfortable. Cat descriptions and pictures under the cut. All three are spayed females and are not declawed.

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Travis Scooter Girl

(Fact)fat girls on bicycles. (I am leaving my error because it is funny)

Ok, so the title is inaccurate. While I'd love to be able to hop on a bike and ride to work, I am fat and I work up on the hill at OHSU and I can't even walk that let alone get a bike up the hill. So a happy medium is to get a Scooter.

So are there any fattie scooter riders? Or anyone knowledgeable on fat-friendly scooters have any tips on what kind I should get and where I should get one?

ETA: This is probably a dumb question but I need a special license to drive a scooter right? Or does my regular driver's license cover it?

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Bullhorn. Megaphone. Loud speaker?

I need one. Any ideas on where a gal might find a (child's) toy megaphone in Portland? I don't really need a proper grown-up one, especially not at the prices I've seen for 'em. Just a little bitty one. That makes my voice come out louder and more obnoxious and slightly warped.


  • offloe

(no subject)

Hey, is anyone going to Gogol Bordello tonight?

Due to a sudden and fortunate bestowment from a friend, I am. Rockin'. I'll be the tall-ish dude with black hair and a green hoodie. Say hello and all.

Not enthralled by French Canadian circus performers? Come see some local theater!

Hey all,
I helped produced this show and I also play in the band for it. Tickets on Thursdays are only SEVEN DOLLARS (Friday and Saturday $10-$12) and so far the show has gotten great response. If you are in need of some cheap and hilarious entertainment, come support some local DIY theater! Oh, and we are far from a religious organization, despite the title of the show. This is by the same people who do "Shakespeare Abridged".

Cacophony Productions presents
In cooperation with the Linkville Players:

Adam Long, Reed Martin, & Austin Tichenor
Additional Material by Matthew Croke

Directed by Simeon Denk
Starring Royal Hebert, Phillip M. Meyer, and Jeff Gardner

March 6th-29th
Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays at 8pm

The Historic Firehouse Theater
1436 SW Montgomery St

Thursdays all tickets $7
Fridays and Saturdays: Students, Seniors, Veterans: $10, Adults: $12

Tickets available at the door or call for reservations at 503.310.0771

Three hilarious young men take you on an irreverent romp through the
sacred text, showing us all why the Good Book can be Great Fun. From
Noah to Nahum; from Peter to Paul to Mary, no biblical figure is left
unscathed. God has been laughing at us since the beginning. Now it's
payback time!

Read what the Willamette Week has to say about our show!:

Whats the best way to play the Bible in two acts? Follow the example
of this shows musical nuns: take a double shot of Gordons dry gin and
go to. Cacophony Productions debut features Terrance and Phillip as
Pharisees and Sadducees, Paris Hilton as Salome, a singalong Noahs
Ark, and an amateur magic show by (who else?) Jesus himself. Actors
Royal Hebert, Phillip Meyer and Jeff Gardner work well as a comedic
team: think Laurel and two Hardys, only one of the Hardys is in
drag and theyve got a good script. One quibble: The song-and-dance
numbers are underprepared. But what The Bible lacks in high-concept
glitz and comedic finesse it makes up for in sheer balls. If there is
a God, these guys have definitely pissed him off. JOHN MINERVINI. The
Firehouse Theatre, 1436 SW Montgomery St., 310-0771. 8 pm
Thursdays-Saturdays. Closes March 29. $7-$12. All ages. Map
  • Current Mood
    optimistic optimistic

(no subject)

I may get slammed for this, but I love the way women walk. Always a fan of human movement, but the way a girl uses her hips is, well, hip-notic.

I didn't realize how nice it was until this one girl on campus was just workin' it. Other girls were walking like linebackers comparatively.

Not sexist, just appreciative. :) I love me some feminine.

update on stuff for FREEEEEE

Hey guys, WOW DP has been really busy the past couple days. I've been SUPER busy and haven't had a chance to get the stuff out or make a CL ad or anything. I still have a TON of clothes (sweaters, coats, dresses [some are cute, some are really obnoxious]) and books and hangers and misc. stuff and some vintage gloves, purses/clutches, wallets? BELTS, etc etc....
Tomorrow, as long as it's not raining, I'll bring it outside, either to the front or back of my apartment. I live around 39th and francis.
email me at ellistherobot at gmail dot com if you maybe want to come by tonight and look through stuff? I should be free around 6ish.

to the people that wanted the papasan- I think it's been spoken for, I'm sorry!
to the people that wanted the orange chair- I still have it, email me.

I still have the japanese mags for sale, there are pop fashion mags and gothic music/fashion mags

So... thanks again guys, and thanks to those of you who already came by and looted!
  • Current Mood
    chipper chipper
alone, solitude

Yoga Me, Yoga You?

Hello all,

Due to the increase in anxiety for no good reason, I've decided to take up yoga again.

I did take a basic yoga class back at Clark College and loved it, so I have experience.

However, when I start having money again, I want to join an actual studio near home. I live in NW Portland and while I know there is no shortage of yoga studios in that area, could someone give me a recommendation for a reasonably priced studio there? I'd prefer not the kind where they raise the tempreture in the room to make you sweat - anything else is fine.

Or, is there some magical website that compares all of them by price, style and hours?

For now, I'm gonna try to drop in on the 24 hour fitness yoga classes, but would like to move to a studio soon.

Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi, you're my only hope!
  • Current Mood
    busy busy


So, I have had a pair of combat boots all my life until my last pair's side zipper broke and the platform split in half on the bottom. It's been awhile since I have worn them and i am missing them deeply! So, my question is, where in the greater Portland area can I get a pair besides the Doc Marten retail store downtown (I'd prefer not to pay $150...$80 would be a reasonable cap)? I'm looking for a straight up pair, no buckles or spikes or any of that nonsense; just 14 eyelet, mid-calf, maybe 1/2 to 1 inch thick platforms.

cruise her

portland's got a lot of bicyclists, a lot of feminists, and a lot of ironic hipsters - i won't create a venn diagram illustrating how many feminist ironic hipsters also ride bicycles, but i'm sure there are plenty. so, yea or nay on the bitchcruiser?

Poll #1153205 bitchcruiser


tired vegan joke
fuck you

quote from the news

As I was channel flipping I heard this on Fox12 news about ten minutes ago:

"After the break we want to show you some live photos of Rose City.... we hope you had a good day today, or even if your day is just starting, we don’t care, we’re just happy you are with us today."

I thought it was nice of them to note that some people might be just waking up at 4pm. I'm still in bed. I woke up two hours ago. But I am home sick today. You? what's your excuse?

parade tape banned!

This just in!

Duct tape, paint, and other things to mark off spots for the Rose Parade this year are now illegal!

I am happy about this because of all the tape and paint that get left after the parade. But I can see why some people are upset. Discuss.
little blue dog

cirque and streetcar

Anyone know how close the Streetcar gets to the Cirque big top?

The Cirque website gives the address as 2750 SW Moody. The Streetcar goes on SW Moody but apparently stops on either side of where I think the big top is.

I don't mind a bit of a hike, but I've got some cranky old coots with me (yes, even older and crankier than me) that want to avoid the headache of parking but probably don't want to walk more than, say, a block.

Whaddya think, DP? Park? or Ride?

sorry all

Please pardon the following questions.  They're not for me but for my housemate.  But for me to help my housemate so I can stop hearing a lot of loud curses.

Is there any place in all of PDX-town where a soul could purchase more RAM for a macbook pro and have it installed, like, today?  Or tomorrow?  How many arms and legs would something like that cost?

Persepolis Maternal Instinct

Speaking of free stuff...let's try this again.

I posted a few weeks ago about free stuff we're giving away at our place, and then promptly lost internet access so I couldn't respond to all the people who were interested. I sincerely apologize for that.

So we're gonna try this one last time. Saturday, we're gonna open the door to our place and people are welcome to come in and just take whatever the hell they want, except the stuff built into the apartment (stove, fridge, sinks, toilet, etc.) It's just like that one Craigslist ad, except we'll be there to stop people from doing something dumb.

Some of the things we're giving away:
A corner computer tower-style desk
A really comfy plush brown velour chair
A click/clack futon with under-seat storage, a machine-washable brown microsuede cover, two matching throw pillows, and an additional memory foam pad
A round kitchen table with four chairs
A long-legged, adjustable height rolling table
A maple endtable
A wheeled nightstand
A chrome over-the-toilet shelving unit
And more! If you like something but you're not sure if we're giving it away, just ask, we'll probably just give it to you anyway (except my set of Pyrex).

Tell your friends! The festivities start at 10 a.m. at the Rachel Anne Apartments, 16300 E. Burnside St. Apt. #306, Portland OR 97233. Free sodas for the first 24 people who come and take our stuff (one per person until our stuff is gone)!

I know it's pretty far out, but if you really need furniture, this is the place to get it!
club 8

CSA time!

Hello Portland!

Can anyone recommend a good CSA, or at least steer me away from any mediocre ones? I've been looking at the website ( but am overwhelmed. My one requirement is that it needs to have a pick-up site in Portland, rather than out on a farm. I'd also prefer one that does both fruits and vegetables.

Thanks, pals!

OK nerds

Alright I've been nursing my B.A. of English for MSU years now.
So now, I'm ponder either a Masters from PSU in Publishing OR OR
Going back for BS in Science most likely Anthropology with an Archaeology focus?

Any DPers here involved in either of these programs at PDX and have any feedback on them?
Other than slams on the University of course.

okay, $75 if you can pick it up tomorrow!

Re: Beautiful vintage 1940's record player
Help me out! Someone from DP came over tonight, but couldn't fit it into her tiny car! I'm sure someone around here would help us or someone else out! I really need to sell this tomorrow!

DP special: $75 to pick it up tomorrow!

The catch- We carried it down the stairs (which was a bit harder than I had expected) so it now far away from any outlet so I can show you it works. You can talk to the girl who was here today if you need reassurance.

artists and performers--help us smash trans misogyny!

Saturday April 12 Camp Trans Fundraiser

Be a part of Portlanders Smash Transmisogyny!

We're calling on the queer and trans community to come together for a day of
action, critical analysis and fun focused on fighting patriarchy and
questioning transmisogyny in our communities.

What is transmisogyny you ask? Transmisogyny is the combination of
Transphobia and Misogyny, as felt by many people on the transfeminine
spectrum. We want to call attention to particular double binds that
transwomen and transfeminine folks end up in caught between heteronormative
gender roles and transphobic vitriol from the queer women's community. We
want to celebrate transwomen's participation in women's spaces, and their
contributions to our communities and the world at large. We want to get a
bunch of awesome people together to show solidarity with transwomen in the
women's community, and to celebrate gender deviancy of all kinds.

We are looking for art and music for a show at In Other Words feminist
bookstore benefiting Camp Trans, loosely on the topic of combating
Transmisogyny. We want visual art, performance art, one woman/man shows,
poetry, bands, anything. Transfemale performers are a plus but not a
requirement, anyone is welcome to submit something, as long as it's on

Know someone or have something you'd like to perform? Send us an email and
help us make something amazing happen.


katenyeart @ gmail . com

omg pr0n

Taking a cue from a recent digression in another thread:
I know there are at least a few porn connoisseurs among us. The question is, with all the gajillions of naughty websites out there, what's your personal favorite source of titillation?
Additionally, what's the weirdest, most disturbing, or most unintentionally hilarious porn site you've come across?

(As if it needed to be said, this thread is probably NSFW.)

Edit: I guess I should list mine, yeah? I was totally in love with when I could afford it. Mostly because I have a disproportionate thing for female orgasms, and doubly so if those females happen to have Australian accents. <3
As for weirdest (if you don't count 2 Girls 1 Cup), I stumbled across an amputee porn site a while ago that was pretty freaky....