I fully realize the person this letter is to most likely isn't on Livejournal, much less this specific community, but I feel the need to get this out, and this just seems like the place to do it.
Dear Mail carrier,
You're an idiot. Yes, I realize my package had a wrong zip code on it. It was off by one digit. 97204 and 97205 are both in your route. There is no SW 10th & Taylor in the 97204 zip code. So what did you do? Just leave my package on a street corner somewhere and call it delivered? It doesn't take a genius to figure out that wherever you left it was not the address on the package!
Remember last Tuesday? The 20th? The day your mail carrier delivered a package to you by mistake even though it wasn't addressed to you? Yeah, that package contained my birthday present from my girlfriend. The present I've been wanting for months and months, that we couldn't really afford, but she made it happen anyway, because she loves me.
So, you got a package that you weren't expecting, because it wasn't yours. And apparently, you figured instead of marking it "wrong address" and giving it back to the mail carrier the next day, you'd just open it up and see what was inside. And you saw that it was a pretty cool little handheld computer, so you figured it should be *your* birthday instead. So now you have my birthday present, and I don't. And instead of getting my present that I was incredibly excited for, I get to deal with filing an insurance claim with the post office for my birthday.
I hope my handheld PC is defective and electrocutes you, shithead.